I know you all have known now for awhile now, and so have I, but as soon as I hit 15 weeks it really hit me. Im reading up on pregnancy and all that I have forgotton! My baby this week is the size of an Orange! and is getting peach fuzz and eyebrows! There is so much going on in my body Im thrilled to be carrying this child!
The first trimester as you all know was hell, so many little things that lead up to just down right hating being pregnant and I think I held it against my poor baby within. After losing now 19 pounds and feeling so much better Im getting excited about being pregnant. Today we went to the Dr. and heard the heart beat, which is always a joy, I told Anberlyn it was the baby and she lit up and smile while saying "Baby, Baby!" Im sure she doesnt really understand that her life is gonna be changing and a new little one will be invading her space, but its a joy to see her react. Every night she kisses me good night then she lifts up my shirt kisses the baby gives my belly a hug and says "bye bye baby" ( I think she really means night night but its still so cute)
Now in 3 weeks time I will be finding out if we will be having a little Nick or a little Tess, I am so nervous, I want a boy so incredibly badly that I feel awful, I know God will give me what He wants for me, but my want is a boy, and I fear that on that day when that say "Its a girl" Im gonna be so sad. I cried when I found out Anbo was a girl, I love her to pieces and wouldnt trade her in for anything, but knowing this is our last pregnancy Im having a hard time with the thought of another girly! But at the same time it would be great to have a girl cuz I have the clothes! hahahaha
Then there are finances! OH how I hate money! I know we will be fine, but its hard this pregnancy is costing us WAY more than we thought it would! Nick asked me today, half kidding, if I could deliver without an epidural so that it would be cheaper!!! I looked at him and laughed! We have medical insurance, dont get me wrong, but there are still tons of costs!
Now Im just rambling Woe is me! Im truly finally excited about this baby and that is what counts! We will be a family of 4 before I know it and we will have another cute little Benson Boy or Girl!