Psycho Mom

Thats what I told Nick I wanted to be, 'One of those psycho moms!'

Growing up I had a friend who wasnt allowed to watch care bears, or things like that...
As they represented the fruit of the spirit, and might confused a young child in the Christian home.
I thought it was funny. At the time, and up until a few weeks ago.

Though I dont plan to go as far as cutting care bears out of our lives,  Im planning on taking A LOT of stuff out.

You see Anberlyn has been saying 'stupid' a lot. I try to explain its not a good word, and she should not say it. Then yesterday we were sitting and watching Toy Story with her, Buzz and Woody were fighting and Woody called Buzz a moron and stupid idiot... Hmmmm Anberlyn is a sponge, she absorbs everything, I think Toy Story is a super cute and fun movie, BUT I think its gonna be put on hold, for a couple years. When she can understand more. When she can make wiser decisions to what she is allowed to say. You may think thats a lot to put on a child, but why put a limit on her?

OR you may be thinking that Im a crazy lady, stupid isnt a bad word, its really not that big of a deal. She could be saying words that are a lot worse! VERY true.

You see, I want to keep my daughters innocent as LONG AS POSSIBLE! I want to shelter them! I want them the be kids! I want their world to be lolli pops and gum drops! and STUPID does not exist in that world!

I also DO NOT want them to be naive, and they wont be, but there is a time and a place for that. An almost 4 year old, is not that time or place!

Having 3 beautiful little girls is a scary little world for me. I am doing my best!

SO here I go, going through their DVDs and hiding the ones I dont think they should watch just yet, if that makes them uncool with their (or my) friends.... Thats ok with me!!

Here is a GREAT site to help you decide, its movie reviews, by Christians, Plugged In. There is also and app! (they have a section for music, video games and TV as well)

Rapping about RAB

One of my bestest friends works hard.
She is a mom of four, {two of which are living in heaven}
She is a wife. A teacher. She is so many things.
This amazing lady is working SOOOO hard so she can be a stay at home mommy.
With working behind her sewing machine when she can.
To be able to do that, she needs your help.
Will you help spread the word about her business?

She has made such great things, one of my favorites is the Artfolio!!!
Anberlyn has the original, and LOVES it.
Its perfect to take to appointments, like the Dr.

I just recently bought one for myself, to take to my prayer group, and whatnot, to take notes, and doodle!

Kristen is going to do a HUGE! Im talking GINORMOUS! giveaway when she hits 500 fans on her FB! I know this can be done, I would LOVE it if you went over and 'LIKE' her page!
PRETTY PLEASE!
Thank you friends! Click ~~~> ROCK A BOW'S FACEBOOK

Im Tired

Soooo tired.
I cant wait to sleep.
Its a wonderful thought, sleep.
One day, I will be able to, but thats not my today.
My today is my children.
The loves of my lives.
Cuddling in the middle of the night.
Comforting.
Feeding.
These moments are gonna fly by.
Im doing my best not to be upset about it.
Im doing my best to just be a mom.

I have a man, a WONDERFUL man.
He doesnt expect much from me.
He understands how tired I am.
He loved me so much.
He is learning as well.
I know he to is tired.
He works SOOOO hard.

He works, so I can be tired at home with my kids.
He works so I can stay in my PJs all day loving on them.
He works so hard, to give be the opportunity to see each and every milestone.
to be there to catch tears.
to kiss boo boos
to watch imaginations grow.
to watch friendships between siblings blossom.
To hug,
to kiss,
to be a mom!
To be a sleep deprived, headached, body aching MOM.

AND I wouldnt change it for the world!
ONE DAY my babies wont need me every waking and nonwaking moment of life.
ONE DAY they wont need me to suckle their noses, to open their snack, to wipe their bums.

When THAT day comes.....

I WILL SLEEP!

Need YOU to choose!

Do you ever wanna take a photo of your hair, and you just dont know how to pose.. What kinda facial expression should you have? lighting? Yeah, I have that problem (keeping nothing from you, scroll down, far, there is like 15 photos):

I do know NOT to take a photo from below, do that and Im welcoming double chin heaven all up on the photo....No one wants that... NO ONE!
ANY HOW!
My hair is currently, kinda the above color, I think its a little Oranger in person.
Im torn, on whether to change it....
I can keep it the above color for awhile longer, I do really like it.
I can go Red, like Red Red, like yeah, red, not red head orange red, like it is now, more crayon deep red...
OR I can go Black. With red chunks. Thats fun.
Its all fun.

I LOVE coloring my hair!

SO You pick! and I will color my hair whatever has the most votes!

a) Keep it as is for now
b) Crayon deep red
c) Black with colored chunks

Try to comment below here on the blog if you can and not FB, but if FB is all you can do, thats fine!

Thanks friends!

Self

Recently I read a blog, she said something about how she dresses for other women and not for her hubby. I thought about that. I thought about it for a long while. I do the same. Its SOOO hard. Im in a MOPS group, they ALL dress so very cute, the young marrieds group Im in, yup dress so cute. Every where I turn! I of COURSE HAVE to fit in. After that post, I decided to make a little change.

My hubby is a jean and T-shirt kinda guy. SO Ive been wearing just that, a normal every day t-shirt with jeans, and he has complimented me! WOOO A COMPLIMENT LOVE it!
Ive been way more comfortable, and WAY more me.
Its been great!

I had a little bit of a hard time going to MOPS and to Bible study like that... I pushed through it, and Im glad I did.

Here is the blog post I read, in case your interested : On My Mind

Oh and, my hubby also prefers no make-up and natural hair.... I dont think Im ready for that... I LOVE make-up and hair!

Hopscotch and Lollipops

So a few months ago a very good friend of mine contacted me and asked me to pick out a few fabrics, she was gonna create a dress line.
Im not gonna lie, at the time I was uber pregnant, tired, sick just plain over, I REALLY didnt want to do it, but I did, cuz I love her. I looked at the first page, picked 3 fabrics that were highlighted that day on the fabric site and was done.
I wasnt thrilled with my choices. kinda blah, kinda not me. I was gonna choose 3 different ones, never got around to it. I felt bad. ACTUALLY I felt TERRIBLE that I really didnt give thought, or put my heart into it, for my friend! UGH oh well.

SO now a few months later, Im not pregnant, well not with Penelope anymore anyway!
The dress line is COMPLETE! We did the photoshoot last week, the dresses are DARLING! Anberlyn is just the cutest in her little dress.
AND I LOVE the fabrics I ended up choosing, they go so well with one another, they are bright, but not overly, they are perfection!

GO Check it out, of course I recommend The Anberlyn dress, but they are all SOOO cute! Go look at them ALL here:


 ROCK A BOW


Will you come back here and let me know what you think? 
I would LOVE to hear!
I will post more photos when I get them!

PS Im not pregnant, I just think Im funny! HAHAHA! ;oD

I like to vent

Has anyone said:
I have best friends. We've been through the world together, there is no more room for new friends. Now get comfortable and share your life, open up!

Yeah I shut down, walls went up. What do you do with that?

The last few months have been a huge battle for me..
Youve seen it. Ive written about it. a couple times.
WOE is me...

A couple things have happened.
Ive put myself in a bubble.
Im floating around.

Im oh so cautious about anything and everything Im saying.
If I say something dumb, I dwell on it for days.
Im so afraid of what others are thinking.
My friends.
Im afraid to get close to anyone.
Im afraid of getting hurt.

I dont want to be hurt.
I dont know how to be a friend.

I hate feeling stupid.
Im afraid of hurting someone else.
I dont want to do that.

Tonight at my agape group,
I said something.
Something I never thought before.
It just came out.

Im not trusting GOD!
Im not trusting Him to bring me a friend.
Im not trusting HIM!

Its not about numbers.
Its about a good small core group,
A group of 1, or group of 5.

Laughing. Crying. Honesty. Godliness.

It will be great.
My heart is out there.
Kinda.

Im putting it in the hands of my Heavenly Father.
This is hard.

I pray my bubble will pop, and I can take a huge step of faith! 

I like to vent here. I like to let it all out.
And if you feel like Im all woe is me..
Why are you writing about this again.

If by chance your rolling your eyes at me...
THEN dont read!
Its simple!

Thanks guys!
I kinda feel a little better!

Though, my heart is still a little broken..
and I dont know what to do...
Im learning to pray.
I think that is a good thing to do!

PS through this, my hubster and I have grown closer! He is truly my best friend! I love him so much!
Pssssssst.. another PS. No pity, Im not looking for that at all! If you wanna say a little prayer, sure, I just wanted to vent though.
Thanks :o)

We have a different new place.
Things were so up in the air.

The Landlord at the other place, kept making changes to the agreement,
AFTER we signed.
So we got out of that.
Now we are having tons of problems with them,
trying to get our deposit and first months rent back from them.

SO we went searching. Less than a week before we were moving.
We found a place.
Cheaper.
Nicer.
Everything new!
God had a plan.

Im glad.
We move tomorrow.
We have lots of work to do!
Just about EVERYTHING is packed.
We did well,
by WE I mean NICK!
Hes done it all.

Help for the move is slim,
its freaking me out!
It will be ok though.

It might be a bit of work for Nick.
It will get done.

YAY!

I LOVE new places. I love moving.
I dont love the process of moving.
hopefully though, this is the last move before the BIG move!

Our dream is to move to Seattle area.
Whether in 3 months or 10 years.

New place

So we went yesterday to look at it.
It was Nicks first time seeing it.

He said he wouldnt have rented it....
OOPS!

I guess I knew he wouldnt like it.

Last time we were looking for a place, a few months back,
everything we looked at and liked,
got rented out to someone else.
So I think when I saw this place,
it was decent,
has everything we were looking for.,
I felt like we had to put in an application fast, hurry take it!!!

Its a little tore back.
Not painted by professionals,
repairs were done sloppy.
Floors installed sloppy.
little things.

BUT there are a lot of great things about it.

We will make it our own.
We will make it home.
Im excited about that.

Hopefully I do it right away,
and they arent just plans, that sit there until we move!
This is a temporary home.
1-2 years.
Im sad Nick wasnt thrilled.
He doesnt hate it.
He kinda likes it.
He just said he wouldnt have rented it!
Oh well.

OH and the master beds walls are grey, not blue/green.
The bathroom walls are blue,
and BEAUTIFUL BRIGHT blue. (The same color as THIS ROOM)
So I think the bathroom walls are bouncing off the gray walls.


NOW Im gonna change the colors of the fabrics I wanna use.

New Desk

I just got this desk.

Its 3ftx5ft ITS HUGE! 

Its kinda cool.
I wanna paint it.
White. but not white WHITE.
Leave the top?
might line the inside.
See the green?

The whole desk was that color, the owner refinished it.
Kinda bummed me out, the green would have been RAD!
It will go in our new room.

This is our new room.

So white seems like a good color.
Im gonna paint our dresser as well.
Its currently stained black.

Our room has always been just a room to sleep in and put our clothing.
I would like it to be a bit of a retreat.
For nick and I.

I picked out sheets for our bed.
they are charcoal gray.
Looking at fabric to recover our current pillows.
These are fabrics Im kinda looking at.
Keeping kinda masculine, still feminine.

 

 

 

I have no idea what to do as headboard.
Im trying to stay with the cheap or free.
The desk was free.

We shall see!
Im excited.
Praying we made the right choice in homes.
I go looking,
I found one $200 cheaper than the one we got.
OH MAN!
I just need to stop!

Hello there

I know I said I had this AMAZING creation, I thought I was a genius, I typed a blog telling you all about it! I havent taken photos, its just sitting there. soon.

You see we CRAZY people have decided to move. AGAIN! The rent at our new place is $150 cheaper, they pay for water, SOOO its about $190- $200 cheaper. IT has a garage, ATTACHED! Its bigger. Im excited. Its in Corona, like a half mile from where we were before. Not the greatest of neighborhoods, but the little community looks nice.

Packing is NUTS!
Stressing me out more than you know.

So for September I had lots of plans lined up.
MOPS, every other Tuesday
Dance for Anbo, every Tuesday.
A moms group every other Thursday
and finally a Womens bible study every other Tuesday evening.
There is also a Corona mops I went back and forth about going to.

I was SOOOOOO stoked about each of this things
First I got put on the waiting list for mops, Im in now! WOOT
Decided last night to hold off on Dance for Anbo, her potty training, is well, GOING DOWN THE DRAIN once again, SOOO frustrating.
Moms group, I just figured its to far now that Im moving, so I did that to myself.
The womens bible study that I was more than excited about, well they decided that they dont want nursing mothers there as a distraction, with the move, I think she will just be to far away if I decided to go to the study, she is only 3 months old.

My goal was to get to know people, throw myself out there. join groups, join Bible studies. I just might have been trying to do to much.
Gods putting the brakes on.

Doesnt change these dumb girly emotions. I cant stop crying. Im RIDICULOUS to say the least.

Lost

Once upon a time I was an outgoing could care less what you think type person!
Then I married Nick, who is kinda to himself, shy and just not an outgoing person.
Her rubbed off on me, instead of me rubbing off on him.
I now keep to myself, have a hard time making friends and all around not the same person.
The friends I had having taken a step back, OR I have. I kind of secluded myself during my last pregnancy, and I still am. I think 3 kids not only scares me but scares others around me.  I separated myself from friends, I wasnt giving my friendship, Im still not, and just isolated myself.

Nick and I sat and talked and talked and talked recently. It was a wonderful time of laughing and tears. Lots of emotions. It was long overdue, as I have been holding so much in. Since giving birth to the last one I was battling the baby blues, I was put on the pill, as to not make any babies right now, and that made it SOOO much worse, I was crying day in and day out feeling extremely alone and just miserable. I stopped taking said pill, and I feel OH SO much better. Im not crying so much. I regret not sharing this with others and dealing with it alone. Nick didnt even know, he just thought I was tired.

So I have made a pack with myself, Im putting myself out there. I will get to know more Christian women. I have signed up for a ladies Bible Study, MOPS, and we attend a Young Marrieds service at our church. I have been making new friends there, and I can not wait for those friendships to grow stronger! I want to re-get to know old friends, and just all around be surrounded by Jesus FREAKS! HEHEHE

I think part of my isolating myself was because I wasnt 'known' for anything, I have friends who are known for their AMAZING voice, for their talents in sewing, for their teaching skills, for their baking skills, and I FELT that I had nothing, one reason I think I started loving nail polishes so much.

BUT WHY?
I want to be known for loving Jesus, for raising my kids to love Him, To be known for loving my husband, for being a homemaker and a wife, OH and a mommy (for being patient!)! Those are my goals, and Im gonna take it one step at a time! Tackling it all at once, and I think I would fail! My kids are still very young, and rest is important as well!

PS and in the friendships I make, Im praying that their husbands, and my hubby get along, because I want my hubster to have friends as well!

Oh My Heart!

Im sitting here with my laptop, on my couch, a TV in front of me, video game systems placed above it, in an entertainment center.
To my left is our dining room, a bookshelf with puzzles, coloring books, crayons, play-doh, a pantry next to that with food!
Next to that is our Kitchen, a fridge with food, cabinets with more dishes than we probably need!
We have 3 bedrooms. Our 2 older girls as of now, have their OWN rooms. They have way more toys than they need. Way more clothing than they NEED.
We have 2 bathrooms. 2 showers, 2 toilets.
We have 2 cars.
Nick has a job.
I stay at home to play and have fun with my kids, and maybe spend to much time on the internet!
I want more nail polish.
I want a Petunia Pickle Bottom diaper bag.
I want, want, want, want!!!!

I love things! I love getting new things!

But what about THIS    (<~~click & Read)
Did you read it? or even just look at the 2 photos. Did you watch that video, she is an AMAZING lady! Growing up I have always said I wanted a little black boy. (and an Asian one) I asked Nick once what he would say if I gave birth to a black baby, he said I would be in a LOT of trouble! haha I can understand that. But thats beside the point. Looking at those photos break my heart. I want them! I want to hold them! I want to feed them! We call our younger 2 girls tubby all the time! Big little bellies, and double chins! They eat so much! Now READ THIS! MAN my kids have got it good. My hear breaks for that mother, the baby, the twin sister! What they have to do to get extra food! 
I want to adopt these babies! I want to show them love! I want I want I want! I think this is a greater want than my nail polishes. I think this is actually probably more of a need! I NEED these sweet babies! Jesus loves the little children! We are called to be Christ like. Therefore I need to love on these babies!!!
And this my friend is my goal! 

PS, Anbo just woke up screaming from HER very own bed wanting a drink of water, I walked to the sink, filled up a cup and she drank!!! HOW BLESSED IS SHE! 

Q is for....

Queen Bee Market!

So many FUN FUN vendors! Im glad Im on a budget (or maybe Im not), and am only allowed to take a certain amount of money, cuz I think I could EASILY go broke!!!

Go to their site, check out the vendors, COME and be excited! I SURELY am!!!

OH! AND to make things even WAY better, yeah they are doing a fundraiser! For each can of food you bring, you get entered into a drawing! 10 cans, 10 chances! OH YEAH! Read about it HERE!

P is for....

Prayer:

and with that, I'm asking for some.

Thank You!!! :o)

O is for.................

 Olive Blue!

I know, I know, I post a lot about my friends products, but how can I not, Im in LOVE with them!!! For Emersyn I had my friend Kami make a carseat cover:

 Black and gray, and reversible.










SOOOO when I was looking for other items I knew I wanted to stick with Black and Gray!
My buddy, pal and friend volunteered to help me out! BOY did she do wonders! Im in LOVE!!
Nicole from Olive Blue created not one but TWO extra large clutches for me to keep diapers and wipes in! I wanted my diaper bag organized now that I have lots of diapers to keep in there! I can just grab a clutch and run to a restroom, instead of taking the whole bag. OH and when Im making a trip to the store, I dump out the diapers and shove my things in!!!
Get ready, I have lots of photos of my clutches!!!:

Phone, wallet, Dave Ramsey wallet, Kindle, Keys, Chapstick, center Pulse point cream!
OH YEAH, it holds A LOT!

A few diapers, wipes and rash cream.

Isn't she pretty!

Packed

GORGEOUS!

Ok so those are great. Nicoley ALSO kindly made me an AWESOME, wonderful lovely nursing cover. I asked her to add a heart on it, over my heart, as a love for nursing my children. she added 4 BEAUTIFUL hearts. I see it as me and my 3 lovelies. This cover is longer and wider, oh how I adore it!

I will get a photo of the whole thing soon!
 

 OH OLIVE BLUE, HOW I LOVE YOU!! :o)

So Olive Blue, Thank You!!!

I also have a couple cowls I bought from her, I should model them for you!

Tankinis

Im in Search of a new suit~! I came across this site and found some cute ones~!

http://www.hapari.com/modest-tankinis/

Where do you go shopping for suits?

Brain is Blah

I have come to blog many times the last few weeks.
BUT since having Baby P I just sit here and stare at the screen.

Im
tired.
drained.
sore.
scatterbrained.
and so much more.

Babies take the best out of you!
P is the NOISIEST sleeper,
grunting and stretching and making all kinds of bizarre sounds &
Im up feeding and changing diapers in the middle of the night,
and you see, Ive always had this problem,
when I wake I have a hard time falling back to sleep.
SOOO Im up all night! HA
(so if your up in the middle of the night, FB me, Ill chat! HA)

My home is a disaster, its always a mess but now its just pretty bad,
If you feel led to come clean it, I will allow it! HAHA
no kidding

This past week Nick and I celebrated 8 years of marriage.
He is my bestest best friend. I love him so much.
I couldnt ask for a better father to my children!
He loves us so much and works so hard so that I can be home.

Ive been MIA, cuz I want to, no, its just tough getting out.
I have to plan way ahead and pack up the night before.
AND because P needs me so much.
She lives in my arms, so much different than my other 2.
So grown adult voices, make me smile.
I think I should start skyping.
That can be my human interaction!

I have a project I wanna do.
Im in need of baskets.
square ones would be best.
If you have some to spare cool,
I will be thrift storing it up soon.


Hopefully my life will get into some kind of routine so I can be here again.
I love blogging.

Thanks for reading this scrabble! :o)

Tater Tot Tuesday- I need Jesus

 Linking up with Rock A Bow's Toddler Talk Tuesday

Not much going on here! Yet so much, I just havent been writing anything down this week.

I found this funny though.

{{{Background}}}
     Anberlyn wakes up a few times a week screaming that she is scared. That there is a monster in her        room or something. SOOO I tell her to talk to Jesus, to ask Him to help calm her heart and take the scary things away. 

OK
So the threes {{{ cough, THREE}}} girls and I went with my friend Stefani and her daughters to get frozen yogurt while the daddies were at dads night out.
The girls started acting up, so we decided it was time to go, it was after 8:30pm, so past bed time. Anbo was not getting in the car and putting herself into her car seat, I was getting a weeeee bit frustrated. She kept yelling that she didnt want to go home, she wanted to stay. I told her no, that we were going straight home and getting ready for bed, that her listening skills were not working correctly and they needed to rest.
She was quiet for a bit then she started crying. She said,"Jesus cant help me, Hes not coming, He is still at his house." I asked her why she needed Jesus' help, she said,"Im scared, I need Jesus right now!!" I asked her what she was scared of. she said, "Im scared of you mommy cuz I wasnt listening, I need Jesus to help me!!!"

This made me laugh a lot. I tried very hard not to let her hear me laugh.

Banana Split Play Date

We had SOO much fun today!
A friend set up a banana split play date!

Whats that you ask....
WELL
Its covering the kids in whip cream, cherries, chocolate syrup, bananas, it was a blast!

Anbo didnt like having it on her.
Em didnt care!
Here are some photos:

Not interested. She ate a banana with whip cream and jumped in the water to wash off.

best buds dress alike!

Sisters

I dont think they look super alike in the photo! BUT comparing Penelope to photos of Em, WOW they look so similar!!!

Who is who??